STOP IT

Stop it. Please. Just FUCKING STOP IT.

Over the last week or so, I noticed a strange phenomena on the Facebooks. People taking this 12-year-old boy looking chick from Harry Potter or whatever pictured above and saying how unbelievably pretty and beautiful she is.

Give me a damn break, people!

Women have terrible tastes in women, and you can find that out by talking to just about any lesbian. I have a lesbian friend who was telling me all about how hot these chicks that she was...I don't know, scissoring....were. And she sent pics. And I remained so flaccid and soft that I could have fucked a keyhole and actually unlocked the door. She'd probably LOVE this Sinead O'Conner rip-off above. Me, on the other hand? I don't like my women to look like crayons.

It's all the same excuses, too. "Pretty is different than hot". True. Point taken. But she ain't pretty. She's plain. She could be Weird Al's wife in Amish Paradise if she'd take off that stupid dress and put on some damn overalls. "It's a classic, exquisite beauty that you just don't see anymore"...well, that's because women don't look like dudes anymore. Seriously...take a look at, say, Martin Van Buren's wife. She looked kinda like a dude. I'll bet Chester Alan Arthur's did, too. Jeez. I wouldn't be able to fuck anyone in 1837. No wonder Thomas Jefferson went black. And come on now....just about anything is going to look elegant in today's fashionable climate. Wrap her up in a meat dress and then we'll talk.

But keep on hyping up these chicks that look like a mix between little boys and radishes, chicks. Maybe some dudes will want to do them and they'll leave the actual good looking ones for me. Guh. Someone take this little guy to baseball practice.